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منتدى البحرين اليوم

I can’t believe I’m missing him so much


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I can’t believe I’m missing him so much, when he broke my heart. He left me in tears night after night as I sat there thinking “He’s happy with some other girl”

He ruined my confidence, my self-esteem, and my opinion on guys. He made love seem like a waste of time. He showed me that there’s no such thing as a happy ending.

 

Yet somewhere inside me, I miss him. I want to hear his voice again, telling me he can’t wait to see me. I want to feel him wrap his arms around me and I want to smell that scent he always carried- that reminded me I was loved. I want him to lie next to me in a field watching the stars, take my hand, wipe my tears away and tell me everything is going to be okay. I want that all over again.

 

But I know that will never happen. Because right now, as I’m writing this and missing him, he’s thinking of another girl. The same as it was that night in April, where I looked at the picture of us, missing him so much, while at exactly the same time he was kissing another girl.

 

Someone else was in his arms, hearing his voice, kissing him, while I lay in bed completely unawares, counting the days until I could see him again.

 

Why is it me missing him? I was the one he lied to, cheated on. He went behind my back. It seems wrong that he hurt me once and now he’s doing it again without even knowing so.

Yet it’s him who should be missing me. He has nothing to be mad at me for, yet I have every right to be mad at him.

But somehow I’m still missing him, and nobody knows it but me.

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